You know the plan things and the pieces of the puzzle just not fitting right feeling. My dad called, seems that is going on for him now with my brother. My brother is being all wishy washy with his schedule and dad is feeling like all the plans and effort he has put into the gathering is getting wasted. I am currently poking said brother about what he really wants rather than what his reactions to my dad are.

I feel I should have a title of Family Translator. I can understand my mom, my dad, and my brother. My dad and brother can talk ok most of the time. My brother and my mom have issues most of the time. I try hard not to have my dad and my mom talk ever. I will say I am unsure at my ability to talk with my brother. I don’t get as much of a chance and his feedback is spotty. He is the one in the family that hides information. I am the one that spills everything everywhere. I realize this talent of mine is of the awesome variety. It is the result of having such a hard time dealing with everyone everywhere growing up. I am trying to heal that part of me but I also own that this skill does grow out of that experience.

Dad made no sounds about helping with my travel expenses (ok honestly covering my travel). He has in the past so this is new for him. Not sure why the change. It could be because he has seen me very recently. It could be because of our dust up when we did see each other recently (but it feels like it was in place before that). It could be because he and I talk regularly and he isn’t as desperate to interact with me.

Part of me is sad that I won’t be on a train for 24 hours each way. Part of me is so happy I won’t be stuck on a train for 24 hours both ways (actually the leg out includes 3 hours on a bus, ick).

This means that I have a lot more time to fill up at home. And a lot more room to maneuver.

The current plans I have is the Unofficial Steampunk day at Dickens Dec 13th. I am actually going to try to make it at the beginning part of the fair instead of squeaking in at the end. I want to see Postcards. And there are singers at Sal’s I want to see. Guess I can spend my train money of London food.

I still feel like crap but not as bad as before. The headache did not get worse (lights aren’t as bothersome) and has actually gone down some. I still need to eat and my body hates me right now. I am still pissy but not as much as before.