I guess it is time for an update on my weekend since soooo many people read my journal 
It was a good thing to do. It was tiring. It was informative (I am just bursting with new info). It was frustrating. It was valuable. It hurt (I had a massive headache each day).
My Dad and his girlfriend came out to CA to take me to a weekend class on the instinctual subtypes of the enneagram.
There are three enneagram subtypes: Self-preservation, Social, One-on-one (otherwise known as Sexual). The concept is that you live in one and visit the others. They influence you as much if not more than your enneagram type. They are the hind brain, the animalistic part of you, the knee-jerk/flight or fight energy. The leaders where very good if somewhat scattered. They had many different ways to present the material which is good to get everybody involved but it did mean they would start with one way to describe something and then switch to another midstream and thereby not tying things together the way I like. I think one of the reasons my head hurt so much is from staining to make the connections there were there but not covered well because they switched which words they were using for something (“energy moving towards” became “aggressive energy”, I think). Argggg.
Also, there was dealing with my Dad. I love him dearly but it takes a lot of energy to hold your own ground. For those in the know, he (and his girlfriend) are One-on-one 8. They expect you to take what they have to give or for you to tell them to back off. It can be very wearing to constantly push back when you aren’t an 8.
I figured I was a Self-pres before the class and it showed me how deep that goes. My weakest area is Social which was a bit of a shocker to me. Yes, I have many friends that are important to me but they way I see them and deal with them is different than the way a Social person does.
A comment of my Dad’s clarified something for me. There use to be a thing called the Gina Palmer Maintenance Team. There are even membership buttons left over from that time thanks to a friend. At events, like sci-fi cons and general running around, people on the Team/friends would watch out for when I needed to eat, when I started to run down, when I needed to take time out. They would be the ones that would explain to those that were worried that “It is ok that she collapsed after dancing a swing dance. She just needs to rest a minute. Some water would be fine but you don’t need to call security or medics, Thank you.” It was such a relief to not have to pay attention to the time and what I had eaten. I didn’t need to deal with the expectations of people that wanted to help but would end up making it worse at a time when my energy is already low. Because I didn’t need to spend energy worrying about some of the basics, I could expand my life to do more things and interact with more people. I could push to the limits and afford to collapse after running past them because others would provide the energy to make it better, I didn’t have to. It was easier for others to watch out for my energy levels that it was for me to maintain a constant monitoring system. This allowed me to use that energy and be a much more fun person to be around. Now I have a better understanding why that worked so well.
Once again the call goes out. If anyone wants to discuss this stuff, let me know. I feel bursting to the seams with knowledge again.
I figured I was a Self-pres before the class and it showed me how deep that goes. My weakest area is Social
Yeah. I’m a one-on-one/sexual (surprise, surprise), but I believe my weakest is social as well, which explains a lot about my socializing style.
Yeah, I figured the one-on-one/sexual for you. The other was a debate between you constantly stiring up the party (social) and your over abundance of food/drink (self pres).
The thing is that as a six, the subtypes tend to manifest in different ways than usual (this is true of all types to some extent, but sixes are more superficially contradictory than average).
The sexual subtype manifests as something referred to as the “strength and beauty” six, which can sometimes be mistaken for a three or an eight. A self-preservation six (IIRC), however, is fixated with groups and with belonging, which can manifest as blindly following the group, or as kicking other people out (xenophobia). Not so much like me.
A social six is similarly group-fixated, which isn’t surprising — that is what sixes are known for. I’ve forgotten the specifics. But Sandra Maitri actually does a really good run-down of the way each subtype manifests for each of the nine major enneatypes. It makes me more obviously a six since I lack a lot of the more obvious characteristics of that major type, by virtue of being a superficially weird subtype.
I went and looked up the 6 subtype descriptions last night (I have a little book by Helen that hits the high points) and was surprised to see how well the self pres 6 matches me. It makes sense with my heavy 6 wing and if I am self pres then it would show that way too, but I had never really thought of it that way before.
The thing is that as a six, the subtypes tend to manifest in different ways than usual (this is true of all types to some extent, but sixes are more superficially contradictory than average).
What I have seen is that all the types have weird ways to manifest the subtype but you 6s are definitely the extremes to almost every case.
Sandra Maitri is‘s fav I believe. I haven’t hit her’s yet. Funny thing about 7s, they don’t like to read. This didn’t make sense to me since I go through one or two books a week until I realized I only read fiction and a select set of fiction at that. I have such a hard time reading for research. If I can’t find my info right away, using an index or some such, I usually quit. There is the impulse to kick the book across the room that I manage to suppress. I am slowly going through Wisdom of the Enneagram (Russ and Hudson). Small doses seem to work.
My dad has been to many workshops/classes on the subtypes and said the information from this one was different than anything he had seen before. Normally, they will go over the 27 different “types” and we didn’t do that. It was much more the underlying groundwork that all of that grows out of. In a way, it makes it easier to understand and derive where this stuff comes from. Now I need the overview of the 27.
Sandra Maitri is atziluth’s fav I believe
That’s where I got the recommendation, yeah.
What are your other sources for enneagram information?
Several web sites, none of which I’ve checked recently. I think there was another book, but I’m blanking on what it was…
I’d be happy to find out more about this – I’m just not sure where to begin. In case you missed my post about it, my results are here, from when I took it last week, and a while back. Those results were generated from similarminds.com.
Ok, so I’m a 9. And a sexual one, although to use that term is probably not the appropriate one to use…
From the simple descriptions it seems right. But now what?
Something to remember about any enneagram test is that the results are not all that accurate. A test on this stuff can not tell you what type you are, it can only tell you what type you might be. They are good to use as pointers. The big problem with test is that enneagram type is about motivations and the test can only test behaviors. Generally, behaviors can match motivations but not always. And there are those people that do the same thing but for completely different reasons. It takes a lot to figure out the motivations and they keep working on the tests to get closer.
What you do now is to keep researching. Take a look at more in depth descriptions of the type you are thinking you are and see it if fits. Look at others and see if they fit better. The tests are good at giving you a starting point. There are workshops and things about this stuff that I have found very useful. Helen Palmer does a thing with panels. A set of each type sits in front and talks about things. You listen to all of them and figure out which one feels more like you. It can be amazing to find people who think so much like you do and see the world through the same filters.
As for why do it at all? It depends on if this information is useful to you. From my point of view it is good to find out why I do what I do and if I am doing something because that is what I should be doing or if it is just habit. A lot of the time, the habits end up resulting in suffering when it doesn’t need to be that way. I also find the enneagram types useful to explain why other people are doing what they are doing. I see a behavior and instead of interpreting it from my perspective, I can attempt to see it from theirs and act accordingly. It has kept me out of a lot of hot water with my boss at work when I first started on this. She was doing things I felt where just wrong, turns out, she was reacting to stuff I was doing that I thought was good. I managed to diffuse the whole situation and stay at this job. That is why I find this stuff useful.
Some internet sources for info
http://9types.com/
http://enneagraminstitute.com/ (you know about this one) Check out the discussion board for more fun
http://www.authenticenneagram.com/Default.htm (includes little videos of people talking about their types)
http://www.enneagramcentral.com/eenstudy.htm (a self study course)
http://www.ennea.com/default.htm
http://enneatrek.homestead.com/ (star trek examples of the types)
And about the term Sexual, there is some debate about this. Some people want to replace it with the term One-on-One because Sexual carries too much meaning in today’s society that doesn’t have anything to do with it really. Within the enneagram/subtype concept, what it means is that you focus on one person at a time. It is a intense direct contact. You look for bonding, a deep connection. You would do anything, including sacrifice yourself for a mate. Socials focus on the group, sacrifice for the sake of the whole/group. Self-pres take care of themselves first.